Life with Meredith and Jillian: In Memory of Coki

Coki

It has been a bit of a rough week in our house. Last week, we had to say good-bye to our first baby, Coki. I think we are all still in a little bit of shock that she is really not here with us anymore. Coki has been a member of our family for almost 10 years and it just doesn't seem possible that she isn't here with us anymore. Coki was such a part of us. She was the first major "decision" Neal and I made together as a married couple. We adopted her, brought her to our first apartment, and she was everything to us. She was even named for a beach where we honeymooned. From there, she helped to make our first house a home - one that we even picked out with her in mind....it needed a good yard for her to play in, of course! She paced and panted as she watched me begin labor with Meredith. She welcomed a new little one into our house. She provided smiles and giggles for Meredith from the moment Meredith knew she was there. She was her fuzzy big sister. She took us to our next home and greeted Jillian as she joined us and made us our happy family of five. The girls love her tremendously. Neal couldn't wait to get home to see her wagging her tail to greet him.

Coki loved to play ball, to swim like you've never seen, to cuddle with her stuffed hedgehog, she had an unnatural ability to jump to any height you can imagine (we often joked that she was part cat). Possibly, one of her favorite past times, however, was driving me bonkers. Still, we loved her and still she was family.

Neal and I are still struggling to remember that she isn't here - we hear her nails hitting on the tile, we are sure we see her coming into the room, or we instinctively go to let her outside or feed her. Meredith was heartbroken when we told her. She has coped really well so far, better than I could have imagined, but I know there will always be times when she is missing her friend. Jillian was much more concerned with all of our tears when we told them than about the news itself. But in the days that have followed, she has been really sad as she wakes up asking where she is and why she has to be in heaven. So, for now, we just talk about her and all the things that she is having fun doing in heaven and how much we loved having her.

So, on that note, I wanted to include some pictures of Coki through the years to remind us of all the good times we had with our fuzzy little girl...

Neal and I right after we brought her home

We loved to spend time in the field behind our apartment together. There was a little pond where Coki would chase the ducks after we played chase with the ball.